Ode to Rent A Husband

The tractor has a flat

The 4-wheeler just stalled

Call the rent a husband

They must be Johnny Halled

 

Always full of patience

He’s never kicked a tool

If you take your shit to the dealer

You’ll be April fooled

 

The McGyver of the farm world

He’ll find what he needs

So many of us would be lost

Sans his skilled repair deeds.

 

No rent a husband would there be

If Mary didn’t love us

He should be fixing her stuff

But she never makes a fuss

 

If I was religious

I’d liken them to saints

Even when it’s last minute

There’s nary a complaint

 

I’m sure they wish I’d find a man

But picky I remain

They get just anyone won’t do

Even though I am a pain

 

Great friends don’t grow on trees

Of this I am certain

The best of the best, I dare say

Won’t mind when you’re a burden

 

So Happy Birthday Johnny Hall

It’s almost time for haaaay

I could never thank you enough for your help

So have the very best day!

 

PS, The tractor really does have flat, so I’ll be callin…muwahahahaha.

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